“I’m sorry, it’s raining today.” This was actually something I said not once, but several times over the past few rainy dreary days in Nashville. I felt bad because I had shoots scheduled and the photographers were going to have to stand in the rain. But why was I sorry it was raining? I really wasn’t sorry it rained, I was thankful. So why did I even say this…
I began to think about the number of times I say “I’m sorry” in a day. I say it when I am running late, for being a mess, for thinking I am taking up someone’s time, and for countless other things. Instead of apologizing and feeling sorry, I realized I need replace I’m sorry with sincere thankfulness. I want to thank people for what that they do for me, not be sorry for them.
I told myself I would replace “I’m sorry” with “thank you.”
Instead of being sorry for the rain, “thank you for meeting me today.” I’m sorry for being late, I started saying “thank you for waiting on me.” On my days when I am a mess, “thank you for loving me on my worst days.” When I feel like I am in the way, “thank you for reminding me I have purpose in this world.”
I often feel like when I am honest, I need to be sorry. That I might be a burden to someone else by telling them what I am actually thinking. Or that I could hurt someone by putting my feelings first. Then I realized, other people do this to me and I don’t even think twice about it. So why do I feel the need to hold everything in? It’s because I feel like I should be the one hurting, and not others, because I would rather hurt than someone else. But how is that fair? It’s not. It starts to build up and eventually I realize I can’t be sorry for everyone and everything.
I need to put myself first and to make myself happy before I can help someone else. Like the attendants instruct on flights, “put your oxygen mask on first, before helping others.”
By putting myself first and reminding myself to be thankful, I’ll improve my relationships with other people and myself. I will begin to see people respect me for finding the positives in “thank yous.”
When I am sorry for something, I am more genuine. I am truly sorry if there is something that I have done and I feel it when I say it. Rather than throwing “I’m sorrys” around like free candy, I wait for when I am truly sorry and have reason to apologize.
The main lesson I plan to take away from this replacement of words is that sometimes you have to put everything to the side just to take care of yourself! Self worth is so important and I hope it is to you too. With everything going on in the world, I can’t help but constantly feel down and sorry for it all but I’m not responsible for it all. I want to be thankful for my friends and family, and take time to remind them of this is positivity. Be a light to the world and find a way to share love with someone today.